im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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