Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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