shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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