Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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