sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
there was a trapeze. enough said
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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