what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
People in love make me want to vomit
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Randomize
