good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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