I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
