no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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