it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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