did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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