Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
