You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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