you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
