I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
