We're facebook friends in real life
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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