Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
