my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
bring money and cleavage
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
