He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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