Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
