new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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