redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize