He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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