How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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