I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
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after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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