I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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