What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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