Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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