I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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