Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Why can't burritos get me drunk
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
