1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
