that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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