? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
