I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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