How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
