It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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