I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
