i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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