i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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