What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
