In the future we'll all be gay
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
