Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
