Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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