I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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