nut hugger
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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