I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
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