i don't like sucking hair
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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