I want to walk on stilts...naked
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
