does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
