Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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