I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Randomize
