Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
